Chapter 3 - A night on the town

It wasn’t but three out of my apartment building that I realize my car keys were attached to the keys I just locked inside my apartment. Not that it really matters because the boot on my Taurus from unpaid parking tickets would prevent me from going anywhere and I didn’t have the money to get it removed anyway, so it’s just one more thing that I am leaving behind. I decide that I need some caffeine to counteract this buzz I got going on, so I head towards this coffee shop that Maria and I frequent. Maybe I headed that way because I also thought I might see her there and would be able to state my case and talk her in to coming back, I mean I’ve done it before. I only had like 35 bucks, so that’d buy me like at least a small coffee, and for some reason I thought to myself that it would be enough to sober me up. The wind had stopped but it was getting dark so the chill started and I was happy that I brought my coat, but completely regretting that I had left all my clothes back there. I was just leaving behind my old self I kept saying to myself, knowing full well that it would take a lot more than that to get me where I wanted. Right before I get to the coffee shop I hear a voice.

“Yo! Dude!” a familiar face yells from across the street and starts running over. It’s pretty typical to run into an old college friend in this part of the city as this is where the yuppies move to try and start their careers and lives. I decide I need to perk up and create the illusion that a complete shit storm is not circling my life.

“Hey man, what’s going on?!” I grin when he finally gets about three feet from me.

“Not much dude” I hate it when he says dude because it always sounds like doooood, “How’s about you?” He looks very typical for this neighborhood, wearing a black suit and black tie with a white shirt, not an expensive ensemble by any means, but he still looks more legitimate than I do. He looks like a recent college grad going on a job interview. His brown hair is gelled and spiked looking very hipster, white teeth grinning back at me, and the aura that he has everything going for him.

“You know, same shit---“

“—different day” He interrupts, “I feel that. Where you off to?”

“Oh, y’know man, bout to grab some joe” I say, still faking a smile.

“Joe...” he laughs “you’re such a fuckin’ old man dude” Then he motions to his left with his head, “Well man, I’m about to go to this club, whattya say you come with and we catch up?”

I really don’t want to go, I mean I got so much shit I want to get done---oh wait. So I stand there for about ten or so seconds with this pondering look on my face and this kind of helps because I am able to continue the illusion that I also have something going for me. Then I think about what kind of person he is. This is the kind of guy that had sex with a lot of chicks and then bragged about it, and at every club he’d ask everyone “what about that one? Or that one?”, then whichever one got the highest marks on the hotness scale he’d end up taking home and rub in everyone’s faces. He was also charismatic and knew everyone where he went, so if you went out with just him he’d run off and talk to people he knows and not introduce who he’s with leaving them behind to fend for themselves. I wonder if this is the kind of situation I want to be in, then realize that the situation I am in already sucks and it really can’t get much worse.

“Yeah man, sounds good. Where we headed?” I ask with kind of an excited tone.

“I know this place, kind of unknown, but very hip. But kinda weird.” He says, confident that he’s cool and still knows the places that are interesting and exciting enough for people our age…or younger.

“I dunno man, I don’t really have a lot of cash…” I say hesitantly, because now I am hinting at my homelessness, poorness and overly douche-bagness presence I bring to the table.

“Oh don’t worry dude,” now I feel better because it might be cheap, “they don’t take cash anyway.” Well, fuck, I think to myself. “You got a credit card don’t you?” He asks somewhat condescendingly.

“Well yeah but---“

“Ok then, let’s go!” He exclaimed, “we can walk it from here.”

So, we start to walk east down Main street. He’s got this pep in his step, like so full of energy and liveliness. He was a year behind me, so I convince myself that his life doesn’t suck yet because he is still younger than me, and briefly I feel better because I think in a year his life will be complete shit and some young fucker is going to meet him on the street and make him wonder why he is not successful and have an apartment and an income and a hot chicks all about. All the while he is asking me about what I am doing for work and where I live and how Maria is, questions I all avoid, then he starts telling me about what he is up to.

“Yeah man, I just got this job working for this financial company as an advisor. In fact Maria was called in to consult for us a couple of months ago, she must have told you that yeah? Dude, we should all get together and hang out!” He says so smug, and all I can think to myself is fuck this guy.

“Yeah. That’s prolly not a good idea.” I say, now more sullenly that I have been pretending to be.

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” He asks almost offended.

“We kind of broke up…” I start to think about explaining more, then I stop myself.

“No shit!” He basically yells in my ear, he had this ecstatic tone in his voice when he says No. “When?”

“Umm about an hour ago.” I say, kind of smirking, letting him know that if he tries to console me I’ll punch him in his peppy face.

“Shit bro, that’s fucked up, well—we—are—gunna—get—you—laid—tonight!” He says happy that he now has an objective in tonight’s adventure. “In fact we’re here doooooood!”

I have no idea what he is talking about, nothing about where we are says that we are at a bar, or even near Central Square where all the bars are. We are at a cross street but it’s too dark to read where we are, and all I can see are row houses down one street and a huge brick building, dark as the night in front of us. There are no signs, no windows, and most importantly no noise coming from outside. Usually outside of any bar in Central City, there are wasted college kids spilling into the street talking about getting a Taco at El Cancun or some term paper they’re not going to do, but not here, it’s silence. There aren’t even cars driving down the streets or a lot full of cars and I start to get really nervous about where this guy has taken me.

“What do you mean here?” I ask in that where have you brought me? Voice.

“Yeah man, told ya it was unknown, but I’m telling you, this place is nuts, we gotta go in through the basement.” He brings me around back of the brick building and we hop over a fence and start walking across this field of dirt and rocks. I start to think that flip flops were a bad idea, because when I died, I really wanted to be wearing nice shoes. About halfway through this field I see a small light attached about 8 feet up on the wall of the building and a small inlet in the brick. When we reach the inlet I see that it has about steps going about 15 steps down. “No ID’s, no bouncers. I know this place from a guy I work with.”

I start to imagine all the types of places that this establishment could be, yet everytime I envision a place just like Lucky’s and really wish I answered the phone when my mom called so I could have told her that I’d be dead soon. Then he reached the door, twisted the dull silver doorknob and held it open for me. There were about 30 more steps going down and it was pitch dark as we walked down. He gets to the next door, a huge metal door, painted dark red about 50 years ago, paint chipping off, rust spots everywhere, and he pulls it open. The noise was deafening. The place was enormous and packed to the gills with dancing men and women among the flashing red and green lights. We walked in, but couldn’t get very far because the second you opened the door you hit someone with it. Mr. Roboto played loudly and a giant screen at the back of the room played the music video for the song.

“TOLD YA—THIS—WAS A GOOD PLACE DUDE!” He yelled while smiling from ear to ear, “LET’S GET A DRINK!”

The bar, or dance floor, or whatever, was all one floor and I noticed that there appeared to be no one watching the door or keeping a watchful eye over the patrons of the “club” as we made our way towards the screen, where I had assumed there was a bar. I noticed everyone had a plastic bottle with a lid that they were holding while they danced or talked (yelled rather) to each other. Every now and then, I’d see a person with the lid off drinking from their bottle. We finally make our way to the beneath the screen and I pat my front right pocket to make sure no one stole my wallet, that’s how close we rubbed up against each other as we meandered to the screen. There under the screen were four guys in black t-shirts. We make our way to the four guys and one of them yells to me “100 bucks! Credit Only!”

I slap my credit card on the table and lean over to my boy “THIS PLACE IS WILD!” Hoping that my credit card won’t get denied.

“WHAT?!” Is all can he reply as he looks around, no doubt looking for some chick he can have sex with.

The guy who took my credit card has one of those old school machines where they put the card on a piece of carbon paper and make a copy and I think that’s great because I know that they will serve me because they wont know my card has been maxed out since I was a senior in college. He gives my card back which I take and then drop on the floor because it is useless and maybe I can say that it was stolen and get some money for it. Then the guy in the black shirt turns, takes a green Nalgene bottle and dunks it in this big trashcan filled with liquid, it makes a couple of huge bubbles and once it is filled he screws the lid on and gives it to me. “100 BUCKS FOR THIS DUDE!” I yell to my awesome friend who brought me to this amazing place while holding up the bottle.

“OH SHIT MAN—I SEE MY BUDDY! BE RIGHT BACK!” It takes a second before I register what he says, and before I can respond, he bounds through the crowd and disappears into a sea of people.

“fuck…” I whisper to myself. I should have known better than to go anywhere with this asshole. He always bounces away to see his friends and never comes back. It’s been 1 minute, 2, 5, and I just stand there under the screen and contemplate what to do here all by myself. I look down at the bottle in my hand, unscrew the cap and start chugging the liquid inside. It tastes like every type of liquor you have ever thrown up on in college all mixed together. I’m in the process of chugging when an hour glass shaped figure walks up to me. I bring the bottle down to my hip and look at this brunette beauty of a stranger with a bright red dress smiling at me.

“YOU DON’T WANNA DO THAT!” She yells.

“WHY NOT?” I yell. Then grin and bring the bottle back to my lips and finish it off. Then everything goes blurry.



***

The bright light and warmth of the sun wakes me immediately. I’m laying facedown on some type of hardwood floor, wearing the same clothes I wore out last night (not that I had anything else to wear). I can taste metal in my mouth and realize quickly that it is dried blood on my lips. I open my eyes and everything is blurry at first but then starts to come into focus. I am looking at what I believe to be a bed about 2 feet in front of me, pink sheets hanging down to the floor. I quickly turn onto my back, sit up, and twist 180 degrees to gather my surroundings. Next to the bed is a window with white lace curtains, and a TV on a stand right in front of the bed. The room I am in is small, maybe 10 feet by 10 feet and all it can really fit is the king size bed, a tv and me laying on the floor. No one is in the bed and it is made, with perfect creases and yellow pillows on top. I turn another 180 degrees and as my eyes come more into focus I see a small kitchenette with dishes piled up and a stove with only one burner on it. I turn 90 degrees and see a door slightly ajar and can smell lilac and hear Sara McLaughlin coming from inside. Just then a figure walks out of the bathroom and my eyes come into full focus.

“Oh! You’re awake!” She exclaims. “I thought you’d be asleep until next week.”

“Umm what happened?!” I yawn as I ask this, but have kind of stern tone to my voice.

“Well do you mean after you chugged the factory fluid?” She laughs.

“Yeah, I guess…” I gather enough strength to bring myself to my feet.

“Well let’s see, I’d like to start by saying I’ve never seen anyone dance like that before,” when she says this it strikes me as odd because I am a terrible dancer, “then you tell me that your girlfriend just left you and your dog died and the place where you lived burned down and I just felt so empathetic that I decided to show you a good time.” Nice, I think to myself, maybe I got lucky last night! “So I brought you back here and we edge towards the bed and you go to kiss me and you pass out standing up, then fall flat on your face and start bleeding. I would have done something, but I had to wake up early for work. I’m just glad you’re not dead.” She laughs.

“Um. Yeah. Me too I guess. Say, can I use your shower before I go?” I ask. I probably stink like a sewage plant and wonder why this gorgeous, tan, perfectly figured woman would ever take me home.

“I gotta go to work, just lock the door on your way out. I wrote my number down and left it on top of the TV. This town is so fucking crazy, everyone here is into some sort of craziness. I swear if someone wrote about this city, it’d make national news.” She chuckles.



Then I think about Lucky’s and the bartender and what Mark said. Then I think, This is it, I found my 60 minutes moment.



She leaves, moving her ass with a swagger that I know she wants me to see but I don’t know why, shutting the door behind her. I take off my clothes, head towards the shower, smiling the whole time about the great things I am about to uncover.